MTL Guide to Surviving Black Friday
Are you the kind of person that wakes up at 5 AM the Friday after Thanksgiving to get in a line in hopes of buying a flat screen TV or newest Apple product at a 60% savings? Well I’m not. I’d prefer to sleep off my food coma rather than wait in line for hours in the cold. There’s a reason they call it Black Friday. People actually trample each other just to save a few bucks. Grim stuff. If you are reading this on your smart phone while waiting in line at Target, you’re a moron.
Even though we don’t approve of hoarding material goods the day after we just gave thanks for all the actual good in our lives, we at MyTennisLessons.com feel it is our duty to warn you of what’s out there. We not only want to give you some advice if you are brave enough to partake in the charade, but we also want to offer you an alternative to dealing with degenerate savers.
- Be Prepared: Think riot gear, pre planned escape routes, and cash in case you need to bribe someone for their product or your life. Again, be prepared for anything. Or you could just sit comfortably at your computer and purchase a MyTennisLessons Black Friday Gift Certificate for a loved one.
- Use Social Media to Your Advantage: Continuously Tweet your activities or Instagram your location so your battalion, I mean family, can locate you once you have been separated from them. Because you will get separated. Or you could just sit comfortably at your computer and purchase a MyTennisLessons Black Friday Gift Certificate for a loved one.
- Go With the Flow: I mean this very literally. If you are stuck in a mob of people move with the crowd. It’s like the ocean’s currents, the middle is moving faster than the perimeter. It’s simple physics, or biology, or something. Or you could just sit comfortably at your computer and purchase a MyTennisLessons Black Friday Gift Certificate for a loved one.
- Remain Calm, Cool, and Collected: Your emotions will be put to the test. You will want to forearm shiver the middle aged woman attempting to grapple the X-Box out of your clutches but that’s assault brotha. Keep your head down and avoid confrontation. Or you could just sit comfortably at your computer and purchase a MyTennisLessons Black Friday Gift Certificate for a loved one.
I hope for your sake you don’t try be a hero. Just get what you came for and pray you make it out alive. But seriously, save yourself the trouble and instead save on some tennis lessons.
